The Dutch version of the PTA
March 6, 2007 at 12:21 PM
by Ashleigh
Last night I went to my second Oudervereniging (OV) meeting as a guest . I become a full member next school year.
The OV is what we would call the PTA in English speaking countries. They take care of relations between the parents, the MR (see below) and the school and arrange activities like trips, sports, parties etc.
The OV levies a charge every year on the parents which funds the activities that they coordinate.
Every parent in the school is a member of the OV, but there is a group of volunteer parents elected to make up the OV committee.
The other important body in the school is the Medezeggenschapsraad, which I suppose in English would convert to the same as the Board of Governors of the school. They deal with more complicated stuff.
Participation in all the aspects of school are very important to me. I want my kids to know that I'm there, that I will give them my time and try to do my best to ensure that they get the best education that they can.
Obviously one of the most effective ways to do that is to be involved in the school at whatever level is possible. Until now I had volunteered for activities, been a klasseouder (class parent), and I am swimming parent for the little kids (kleuterzwemouder). I always found the idea of volunteering for the OV committee a bit daunting.
Some schools have a very active OV and MR. Ours does not. There are a few stalwarts who make up the two committees, but they desperately need new people. So I volunteered.
I suppose one of the reasons I found joining to be so difficult is the language. To attend a meeting like this in a different language where people mumble, use colloquialisms and the conversation is fast, is hard. I feel as though I have to concentrate intensely just to keep up.
The other factor is being able to read the nuances of a situation. Of course, PTA committees are rife with politics. They're about as political as you can get outside of the government. The strange part is that I know how the politics work in English speaking countries, but I can't quite seem to grasp the subtexts here. I feel as though I'm at sea, and I have a hole in my dinghy, and I'm not sure how to bale water!
I know that any faux pas that I make will be excused on the basis of being 'foreign' but it bugs me, nonetheless. I wonder if it's my own insecurities or shyness that make the situation seem worse than it really is?
I remember when Seb started at school I had this terrible feeling of being completely isolated on the schoolplein (playground) while I waited for him to come out of school. It took months for me to feel comfortable. Then a while later I read a column in a Dutch magazine where a journalist mom described her own feelings about standing on the schoolplein and hers were exactly the same!
I quickly realised that pretty much every mom who stands on the schoolplein has the same feelings!
Maybe every mom who joins the OV has the same feelings too, whether they are Dutch or foreign?
Comments
I understand how you feel! In Germany, it's called the Elternabend, and while my German is fairly good, I still miss things and have to check back with other parents if I understood everything. Last time I forced myself to speak, not that I felt strongly about the topic under discussion, but I just thought if I don't say something now I never will. Oh yes, and it's usually deadly dull.
What you need is a good bake sale. Or a craft bazaar to raise funds for the school. You'd blow them away with your creativity and talents and they'd be begging to be your friend!
{And I think everyone has felt this sense of being the outsider at some point. You are doing a great thing by putting yourself out there and stretching your comfort limits. Your wee ones are certain to recognize that later in life!}
Kudos to you for joining! I've never gotten further than knutselmoeder :-)
We moved from a big Southern city to a small village in Friesland, where the language at OV meetings is Fries -- so even though my Dutch is quite good, I'd have to learn Fries as well before joining. Don't see that happening soon.
And I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who dreads standing about in the elementary schoolyard.
I also enjoyed your version1/version2 post. You commented on the 'happy' photos of our weekend on Terschelling -- I had to keep throwing away the temper tantrum photos because my photocard kept filling up, otherwise there would have been plenty of tears and snot and dirty looks and angry backs to show!
I'm impressed! Your Dutch must be great if you are aware of the nuances at all. I wasn't aware of this aspect of Dutch culture - thanks for writing about it.
That's awesome! I've also felt that kind of insecurity being at meetings and things held in German, so I know it's not easy to volunteer for something like that. Good for you for going for it! Just remember that coming from somewhere else can be a strength too, you probably have ideas about how to do things that they've never thought of. And Kelli is right, I'm sure you'll blow them away with your charisma and creativity :D good luck!
It takes a lot of courage to step out of the "expat bubble" and claim some local turf. As an expat I have to fight the urge to always act like a "guest" in this country and not someone who belongs here and has a right to participate. By that I mean, it's easy to become so preoccupied with assimilating and fitting into the local culture that we fail to be ourselves and offer that to the process.
dutch, scared on the playtground and not yet member of an activitygroup. Husband joins the mr so I am of the hook for a while....I would be quite jealous of your excuse I think...
What wonderful support you've gotten!
I can understand you're wanting to hold back and think it's fantastic to try.
Pff don't get me started. If there is politics in school, you'll find it in the OV. I mean, come on, put up to 14 women in a room and let them discuss something... I co-chaired our OV for 6 years, I know! I thoroughly enjoyed to make things happen and I liked to have an insiders view on school going-ons. Plus my kids felt secure and a bit priviliged that their mom was there organizing things and being valued by their teachers.
I was on the OV 2 years ago and those meetings really did me in. I couldn't understand about 25% of what was going on, and I was desperately bored by at least half of what I did understand. Next year, when Rowen's in school, I'll try again. I really salute you for having the courage and making the time to be an OV member. Your kids will thank you for it, too!
March 6, 2007 5:38 PM